UNDERACHIEVEMENT IN GIFTED EDUCATION

Centre for Applied Motivation - The Importance of Certainty

In discussing certainty and children we are talking about certainty as a high level of constancy, stability, durability, assurance, and truth in behavior. Certainty may include relative predictability in family, friends, school, chores, jobs, place of living, living style, and guidance from interested, trusted adults. Developing children want and need certainty in their lives. Constancy and certainty are especially important if an individual is insecure or not yet mature. As children develop emotionally and intellectually, their need for certainty lessens (but never totally disappears). Areas of certainty are helpful toward focusing children in their development and in providing sounding-boards from which a child can gain perspective. Such stability through known, predictable factors in their experience allows them both the energy and the time to think and to make decisions. With such predictability, they are less distracted and less preoccupied with their basic needs and are more likely to expend their energies in emotional and intellectual growth. This enables them to develop their sense of self, their core values, and their personality. It allows them to have a secure base from which to compare their thoughts, feelings, reactions, and decisions as they go through life. It provides them with perspective. It gives them confidence as they struggle with personal development and as they grow into their view of the world. A child with a reasonable world of certainty is more apt to be a child who is engaged, self-motivated, relatively clear on values, and future-focused. What then occurs is a cat-and-mouse game in which a child begins to step gently into risk, learning to gauge it, learning to make appropriate assessments, and learning to consciously choose a course of action.

In most cases, a child who does not have enough certainties will find it difficult to relate to others, to develop a sense of self, to develop confidence, to develop a sense of belonging, and to develop self-motivation. When much of a child’s experience is unpredictable that child will spend a considerable portion of his or her emotional and intellectual energy in trying to anticipate and in trying to predict what will happen next. The absence of core certainties leads to personal uncertainty (indecision, detachment, interfering anxiety, self-doubt, and so forth). Children experiencing uncertainty will often divest themselves of a proactive view, replacing it with a reactive and defensive posture, trying to protect themselves. This often results in the underachieving behaviors and low motivation which are then so undermining of their experiences and their possibilities. With underachievers, feelings of personal inadequacy are triggered. For them, inconsistency equals unpredictability, equals confusion and doubt. These children spend considerable time and energy seeking certainty. Many of the children who do not find it in family and home seek it through peer groups (sometimes with worrisome results). Often they will seek certainty in mediocrity, a downward adjustment of their expectations. Mediocrity may not be what they want, but it is predictable for them and thus accepted by them because it is certain. Indifference and nonchalance then become primary modes of reacting.

It is important for parents, teachers, and significant others to purposefully and consciously provide basic certainty for the children with whom they are actively involved. Especially when most adults seem so pulled in several directions, and when time is at a premium, it is important to consciously take the time for establishing certainties for maturing children. As an influential adult, when dealing with children, set rules and standards (explaining why) and then be consistent with them. While there will be variations from family to family and from child to child, each child needs to know what is firm, what is negotiable, and where there is self-discretion. Once parameters are set (and until increased development and circumstance warrants change) consistency to those parameters is important. Predictability can most easily be attained both through consistent parenting (including established expectations, rules and behaviors) and by creating patterns in living (such as "We always eat Sunday dinner together.") Think of certainty as a protective fence around your child. Knowing the boundaries not only keeps a child from stepping over the line, but also keeps others from invading. A proper gateway allows for freedom. As a child appropriately grows and develops the "fence" can be enlarged. The fence area should allow plenty of room for creativity and self-expression, but still be guiding. For example, while you may always eat Sunday dinner together the time of the meal, the food served, and the locations may change. The predictability of such a family ritual and the time spent together (especially if used for positive interaction) will be appreciated in the long term.

In addition to certainty there needs to be a goal of establishing an appreciation of being able to handle reasonable risk. Outside of absolute certainty there is an area of risk - and within that area of risk is a field of reasonable risk. When a child is developing, in order for that child to gain in self-confidence, the child must experience success that comes out of reasonable risk-taking. Without such success there will be no "stretching." Even occasional setbacks that come with reasonable risks can be beneficial when used as learning experiences. The results from reasonable risk-taking allow a child to gauge outcomes, to survive setbacks, to handle comfort or discomfort, and to determine which risks are reasonable. Over time most people move along a continuum, periodically entertaining reasonable risk as they find opportunity and as they feel confident or back stepping as they feel less confident and feel a need to retrench in certainty. Without an understanding of what is "reasonable" a child may be too frightened to try at all, or may be "dare devilish" with excessive risks. Too much uncertainty is unsettling, and each individual sets his or she tolerance for risk-taking depending on the particular situation involved, personal experiences, knowledge, and personal feeling (such as, weak, vulnerable, overwhelmed, self-doubting, anxious, or self-confident, capable, invigorated, challenged, willing, etc.).

There are positive ways of minimizing uncertainty and maximizing certainty. Through personal effort and work, acceptance of personal responsibility, application, persistence, and a sense of control, we can make ourselves feel relatively certain of our world. There are also negative ways of temporarily minimizing uncertainty. Through resistance, repression, denial, minimization and rationalization, we can distort our reality into "thinking" that things are different, but they really are not. A self-motivated achiever’s view is that certainty increases (and the ability to effectively handle uncertainty) through personal effectiveness, control, consistency, effort, opportunity, certain and clear emotions, and facing reality. This is a take charge and personal responsibility perspective. Unmotivated and underachieving individuals have a contrasting perspective. They feel that uncertainty is (ironically) caused by success, change, effort, opportunity, transition, initiative, emotions, independence, facing reality, and personal responsibility. This is all attitude and perspective, but as such it has much of its base in early elementary feelings of certainty.

As an enlightened, concerned parent, teacher or other adult, it is important for you when dealing with children to assess the presence of enough certainty which will allow and assist the child’s development. It is beneficial to understand what areas of certainly are particularly important and what areas you can directly effect or indirectly influence. These areas should include things such as parental and personal actions and reactions, home environment, school environment, family living patterns, community and friendships, activities and celebrations and mentoring. While parents are the most influential individuals in providing certainly for a child, the role of teachers, mentors and other adults should not be minimized. These significant others can have dramatic impact especially if parents and home situations are lacking in certainty and security. Concerned adults should give consideration as to where there is enough stability while still allowing for spontaneity, discovery and growth. Taking the time to determine what areas of certainty are especially appreciated and enjoyed is important. Exploring and remedying those areas that are not productive, that are stifling, that cause fear, or that are inconsistent is necessary. Remember that a balance is needed. There should be enough certainty to aid development but too much certainty can lead to complacency or to a feeling of being stuck.

Certainty is an important element in fostering a self-motivated child. A core environment of certainty and stability allows a child the freedom to grow and develop with less confusion, anxiety, and conflict. This is turn fosters reasonable risk taking, resiliency, heightened productivity, self-motivation, and self-worth. Certainty, while often not discussed, is a basic element of self-development.

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© Center for Applied Motivation, Inc.